Saiyuki Karaoke
by SetsunaNoroi
Summary: Bad songfic that I thought up. It's funny... to me at least. Goku probably had too much cookies. Rated for latter chapters but nothing serious.
1. Random Monkey Karaoke

I just had to write this. It just popped into my head and I knew that I needed to share it with the world and make them suffer like I did.

Don't own Saiyuki or Garfield or the ant song from the Garfield and Friends show. I don't own any drugs either do I can't even blame that for writing this.

I've never done a parody/humor or an anime fic so I'm sorry if it sucks. This also hasn't been betaed because 1.) its too short to worry about it 2.) I don't think my beta has seen the Saiyuki anime. I'll ask him later.

Without further ado:

Random Monkey Karaoke!

"I am the Goku that will eat your dinner,

I am the Goku that will take your food away,

With me around you'll all get thinner,

Give me the chance and I will take your food away!"

Moral of the story, don't give monkeys sugar while they're watching Saturday morning cartoons. Don't give sugar to Saturday morning cartoon watching authors either.

---

'Kay, that was it. Short I know but it's a short song. My A/N was actually longer. Since you simply reading this crap was good of you, it'd seem cruel to ask you to review. But I will anyway, because I'm evil like that.

Next week (or when ever I get around to it) 'What do you do to a drunken Gojyo?'. It's going to be good.


	2. What do You do with a drunken Kappa?

Okay… I was hoping for more feedback than this. One review, I guess I wasn't that funny. Ah well, this is just for fun, no big deal. And since I only got one review, than I guess that I'll have to dedicate this chapter to her (at least I'm pretty sure that you're a her). Writer-pretender 11, thank you for reviewing my fic when I'm sure everyone was simply hitting the back button on me.

I own neither Saiyuki, nor do I own Nando, my beta who has kindly agreed to beta this even though he's never seen the show. He's a great guy, read his stuff. It's all Final Fantasy 7 stuff and he is in my favorite author list.

By the way, kappa is a water sprite in Japanese. Goyjo (who this song is about) happens to be half kappa. Also, this fic is a parody of 'What do you do with a drunken sailor?' an already very… interesting song. I hope I did it justice.

And now with the almighty power of typing fingers, I do hereby summon…

Why Kappas Shouldn't Drink!

a.k.a.

What do you do With a Drunken Kappa?

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

Earl-aye in the morning?

Put him the bed with a sleeping Sanzo,

Put him the bed with a sleeping Sanzo,

Put him the bed with a sleeping Sanzo,

Earl-aye in the morning.

Have you ever seen a pissed off Sanzo,

Have you ever seen a pissed off Sanzo,

Have you ever seen a pissed off Sanzo,

Earl-aye in the morning?

"Die!" he says and shoots his pistol,

"Die!" he says and shoots his pistol,

"Die!" he says and shoots his pistol,

Earl-aye in the morning.

What do you do with a half-dead kappa,

What do you do with a half-dead kappa,

What do you do with a half-dead kappa,

Earl-ayeEarly in the morning?

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

Earl-aye in the morning?

Tell the monkey that kappas taste good,

Tell the monkey that kappas taste good,

Tell the monkey that kappas taste good,

Earl-aye in the morning.

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

Earl-aye in the morning?

Give him to Lirin with some crazy glue,

Give him to Lirin with some crazy glue,

Give him to Lirin with some crazy glue,

Earl-aye in the morning.

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

Earl-aye in the morning?

Write 'Pansy for sale' on his forehead,

Write 'Pansy for sale' on his forehead,

Write 'Pansy for sale' on his forehead,

Earl-aye in the morning.

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

What do you do with a drunken kappa,

Earl-aye in the morning?

Hakkai's was scary so I had to censor it,

Hakkai's was scary so I had to censor it,

Hakkai's was scary so I had to censor it,

Earl-aye in the morning.

---------

'Kay, that's all. I hoped it was better than the first one. Review and let me know. I have a half-baked idea about a Sanzo song fic but I'm opening the table to suggestions if you have a specific request.


	3. Sanzo the Angry Buddhist

This is a little late after the holidays but the inspiration hit me so I decided that I just had to do it. This is a parody of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer for Sanzo.

I own neither Rudolph nor Saiyuki. They both belong to people much more important and talented than me. Also, the rating has gone too T because of last chapter. I thought I had changed it last time but it seems I didn't. Sorry if this causes a problem for any of you trying to find my fic the fast way. I myself alway remebered ratings to be one more detail to look by. Sorry again.

'Sanzo the Angry Buddhist' by Noroi

Sanzo the angry Buddhist,

Had a gun full of lead,

And if you ever saw it,

Chances are you were already dead.

All of the other Buddhists,

Just couldn't understand,

Why he rescued a dumb monkey,

That loved to get out of hand.

Than one lovely day in Chang-ang,

The three heads came to say,

'Sanzo with you're Scriptures so bright,

Won't you save the world tonight?'

(Me: Even though it took waaaay longer than that.)

Then how Sanzo was pissed off,

But he said he'd go with the three,

Sanzo the Angry Buddhist,

You'll go down in history.

End.

Wasn't that just lovely. Probably my best work.

BANG!

Aieeee! Sanzo! Wait! I didn't mean anything by it! Don't kill me!

Sanzo: Die, you little piece of dirt.

BANG!

Um, please read and review. I gotta run.

Hakkai: Well, there she goes. Poor girl.

Goku: But I thought it was kinda funny.

Gojyo: You didn't even notice the dumb monkey bit, did you?

Goku: What? Where? (See's verse 2) Noroi! I'll teach you for calling me a monkey! (Runs off)

Gojyo: Actually, now that you mention it the whole pansy for sale thing did kinda piss me off.

Hakkai: Are you going to chase her as well?

Gojyo: (Shrugs) At least to watch. (Leaves)

Hakkai: Oh my. Well since Miss Noroi isn't here than I'll do it for her. She's already requested a review but she failed to mention how she'll be writing a song for me next.

BANG!

Hakkai: If she lives that long. As she said before, resquests are welcome. Have a nice day.


End file.
